APPLE NEW IOS INTRODUCES TONGUE DETECTION

Apple started their yearly developers conference yesterday, and made a bunch of announcements about the next version of iOS.  Everybody was hoping they would make Siri smarter, but instead we got . . . "tongue detection."  So get ready to step your sexting game up this fall.


"Animoji do such an amazing job at tracking our expressions, and this year, we're taking Animoji to a whole new level with breakthrough new technology we call tongue detection," Craig Federighi, Apple's SVP of software engineering, told the crowd.

"We're all going to be sticking out our tongues to our phones in the near future," he said.

 

Next Apple unveiled what it calls Memoji, which can also be described as a fancy ripoff of Bitmoji. But with the addition of tongue detection, Memoji means people will be creating emoji of themselves, licking the air in front of their screen in a desperate digital attempt at getting laid.

 

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